The Art of Getting Quiet

Last summer I booked a coaching call with Erin Brown to get some clarity around my career and creative paths.  I was going through a difficult time in my personal life, working through some things that happened in my past that I could no longer ignore.  Hop on my newsletter list for the details if you’re curious about that sort of thing.

So, with the encouragement of my therapist, I reached out and disclosed what I was working through to some important friends and family members, and sought the guidance of a coach I admire a great deal.

During our Skype date we touched on my anxiety surrounding posting to social media to keep my Rural Rebel Mama brand relevant while I was working through my own healing.

I told her I had gotten quiet.  She had noticed, and gently/firmly urged me to start talking to you about why I get quiet at certain times of the year.  This post has been in the works since.

I live with depression.  It is seasonal in nature, having ebbs and flows that usually centre around winter.  This year has been an incredibly mild year for it, partly because we have had an unseasonably warm winter with little snow and manageable temperatures, partly because I have a whole new arsenal of tools to help me through it.  If you missed it, I recorded a podcast with Dan Keogh here in which we discuss in length the three things that keep me above water during a depressive episode or period these days.

I’m set to record another episode with Dan, if there is anything you would like to hear more about please leave a comment below or email me here.

But still, even in the absence of more days sad than not in a row, I get quiet.  I had always assumed it was mental health related, but in light of my fairly good year for depression (is this a thing? it is now), I have come to realize I also get quiet for other reasons.

Sometimes, I am busy with family things.  My kids are still so little but the years are flying by.  My husband travels for work so when he’s gone I’m extra momming and when he’s here I’m hanging out with him.  I’m choosing presence as often as possible.

Sometimes, I am busy with coaching things.  We have 20 women in our current group who I am creating for and coaching every day.  I love the work, but there is certainly a lot of it.

And sometimes, I am busy with Amber things.  I didn’t realize it until I read it in Glennon’s book, but sometimes I get quiet because I am busy inhaling, aka, reading.  And this last season I’ve been reading a great deal.  It’s important to me to be a relevant and interesting writer, but in order to do that I sometimes need to recharge with other people’s words and ideas.  This spring I have read 5 books for pleasure, one of the best of which was Carry On, Warrior, from Glennon Melton Doyle, where I got the quote from.

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I also obtained my pre and postnatal fitness certification from Total Mommy Fitness, and am now one chapter away from being ready to test on my Strength and Conditioning Specialist Certification from the ISSA.  I also had the opportunity to attend a business mastermind with the group of women I will create big things with in the future.

None of these things are requirements, but they’ve lead me to a deeper understanding of business, women’s fitness, and muscle development.  I now have a new arsenal of movements and tools to help women get in and stay in great shape while pregnant or postpartum, or you know, just being alive.  And a strategy to scale my business in the coming years.  And new inspiration for writing and new methodologies for coaching.

I feel the clouds parting and the words welling.  And as you can probably tell if you are still reading down here, they are ready to be exhaled again.  I’m going to be opening the RRM 66 again in July.  If you are interested click here to get on the waitlist.

And all this makes me curious, do you do something to let your soul breathe?  Do you dance, paint, create somehow?  Does inspiration come in seasons for you, or do you create constantly?  I’d love to hear your insight, please comment below if you would like to chat.

Thanks for reading,




  • Clancy

    July 22, 2016

    I love this Amber! I honestly thought I was the only person who had ebbs and flows in their output. I thought everyone else in the world had an “even flow” as such. I’m guessing we aren’t the only ones and it’s part of the norm. This year I’ve gone back to meditating (something I loved many years ago) and it is helping me tremendously.

    I also absolutely have to say I LOVE that you keep going – ebbs and flows and all – instead of waiting for perfect (in your own mind), this is something I’m yet to do myself and I think it is a huuuuge accomplishment.


    • Amber

      July 22, 2016

      <3 thanks so much Clancy! I think through being honest with myself about what is going on and giving myself some grace to just get through it, I’ve been able to look at things in a new light. I’m not a quitter because I take breaks. I’m just resting/recharging! We all need it!