Timing

You know when you meet someone and you sense, nearly immediately, that you are going to like them?  And although you’re tentative at first it doesn’t take long for you to warm up and slip into a comfortable rhythm with conversation and confession, almost like you’ve been waiting for them to arrive at just that moment and it all just falls into place?  I’ve been lucky enough to make that kind of connection with people a lot in my life.  Of course I have seen people come and go, sometimes expected, sometimes with a blunt and painful force that leaves me reeling.  I have old friends that I lose touch with and then regain it again with fluidity and ease.  I have other friends that I’ve let just drift over the years.  But for the most part I tend to keep the people in my life that I have that instant spark with.  They are often the ones that push me and support me and challenge me and force me to defend my ideas, sometimes with grace and sometimes without.

I first met my husband’s cousin a couple of years after we started dating.  That night, after a few beers, he looked at me and said “my cousin has had many woman chasing after him in his life, but no one has been able to nail him down.  What is so special about you?”  And after a second of digesting that someone was actually asking me such a question I replied, without hesitation, “Timing.  I walked into his life when we were both looking for the same thing.  It’s always just been easy to be together, we fit.”  The truth is actually a lot more complicated than that now; jobs and kids and life can sometimes get pretty damn difficult.  But the fact remains that the moment I laid eyes on the man I knew I wanted to know him more.  The weekend I met him still has a surreal feeling to me in my memory, much like it did when I experienced it.  Like I was supposed to be there and my life was about to happen right before my eyes, as long as I reached out and grabbed it.  Or in this case, him.  Ha.

Learning to lift weights is another one of those things that I just felt connected to, easily.  I was ready for real change, ready to shed this fat suit and take control of my health once and for all.  I was ready to hear what strong women had to say, and ready to change the way I allowed food to make me feel.  For years I’ve been self medicating with the wrong ingredients, and now I’m finally ready to medicate myself with the right ones.  What a difference I already see and feel.  I am SWIMMING in my fat clothes.  It’s almost comical how huge everything is.  So hard to believe that it was all tight and making me miserable three months ago. And I am getting stronger.  Every week I am STRONGER.

The decision to go public with my experiences on this program has already pushed me right out of my comfort zone.  Putting pictures of myself on the internet for the world to see where I’ve been is kind of terrifying, not to mention talking about my feelings. But I can’t deny that it pushes me!  It pushes me to keep going.  And it’s pushing me to do what I can to improve my pages too.  I’m taking a kick ass social media class right now which is definitely forcing me out of my comfort zone, and I love it.  I’m learning and sharing and writing again. I’ve missed doing those things!  As a mom of two small littles I haven’t had as much of an opportunity to push myself to do “adult” things that often in the past 2 years.  It feels amazing.  And because I’m an enterprising person that is dead set on hopping on the timing of something if it feels right, I have inquired about personal training.  Yes I did! Great things to come, I just know it!  Be well!

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